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Jim Bakker is 71 and Selling Some Crazy, Crazy Junk

Jeepers, Jim Bakker.

The disgraced TV evangelist turns 71 today. He’s been back on the air since 2006 with a religious show based in Branson, Missouri.

And what a show it is! You’d think five years in prison for his 1980s financial shenanigans might have slowed him down.  But quite the opposite!  His new gag is begging for money — that is, “love gifts” — by offering K-Tel style junk in return.  Like the Urban Rebounder exercise device shown above. It’s yours for a love gift of $100!

But Bakker doesn’t even stop there: he’s preaching apocalypse and selling survival gear:

We have to acknowledge, at some point, that everything the Bible says will take place in the Last Days, is taking place NOW – this is it!  We are right now hearing, seeing and feeling the effects of the events of the End Times.

So jump to the survivalism section of his love gifts catalog, where you can drop $100 on silver solution gel (“proven promising against epidemic outbreaks, contagious diseases, and even bio-terrorist attacks”) or buy the Seychelle water pitcher (“Removes 99.9999% of all contaminants including Radon & Anthrax”), yours for a love gift of $60.

Still got cash on hand?  A love gift of $3500 gets you the full Time of Trouble package, with two water pitchers plus 28 “275-serving Emergency Food Supply Buckets.”  (Add a 20-cent emergency fire starter for ten bucks.)

Bakker is joined in the new endeavor by his second wife, Lori Bakker.  (Tammy Faye, his first wife, divorced him while he was in prison and died in 2007.)  Lori would also like you to give $1000 and get an 18-inch statue of Christ in return.

Say this for Jim Bakker: even by the standards of televangelists, that guy has got some pretty big emergency food buckets.

 

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