Punxsutawney Phil has made his annual Groundhog Day prediction, and it’s a shocker: spring is almost here. The ageless groundhog failed to see his shadow (according to his official site) for only the 14th time since 1886.
As it happens, the United Nations tried to rain on Phil’s parade by releasing its report on global warming the same morning. The UN says that by 2100 the world is likely to see temperature increases of 3 to 8 degrees (F) and a rise in ocean levels of up to 30 inches.
The attention-loving Phil, though, outfoxed the UN by preemptively embracing global warming as “just great” in his annual poem:
“El Nino has caused high winds, heavy snow, ice and freezing temperatures in the west.
Here in the East with much mild winter weather we have been blessed.
Global warming has caused a great debate.
This mild winter makes it seem just great.
On this Groundhog Day we think of one thing.
Will we have winter or will we have spring?
On Gobbler’s Knob I see no shadow today.
I predict that early spring is on the way.”
The message, as always: don’t mess with a rappin’ groundhog. Get in his spotlight and he’ll smack you down.