Somewhere, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is celebrating. Paul the Octopus has died.
You may recall that after the octopus astoundingly predicted the winner of seven straight World Cup matches this summer, President Ahmadinejad bizarrely called Paul “a symbol of all that is wrong with the western world.”
Paul was found dead in his tank this morning. The official word is “natural causes,” which is just another way of saying “secret Iranian hit squad.” Probably they slipped arsenic into his crayfish.
At least Paul went out on top, retiring a perfect 7-for-7.