The Who2 Blog

Cain Train: Pain Reigns

Presidential candidate Herman Cain says he will “suspend” his campaign. He says all the rumors about adultery cause too much pain for his wife and family, and he also says a bunch of other stuff.

But since Herman Cain isn’t going to be president any time soon, it doesn’t matter that much what he said. Still, I watched his announcement, so I’ll give you a quick rundown, paraphrasing (mostly):

“This nation is screwed up.”

“You don’t have to have a degree from Harvard to run for president.”

“I didn’t use to be famous, now I am.”

“Fourth place is really good!”

“I take responsibility for mistakes I’ve made, and I didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I don’t like that guy in the White House.

“Politics is dirty.”

“If we want to save this country, you have to ignore what you found out about me.”

“I like the U.S.”

“I believe these words came from the Pokemon movie.” He really did say that.

“Life is hard. Keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars.”

It doesn’t look as though Herman Cain is going to be re-entering the race. That’s at least $10 million in raised funds gone, is that right?

No, not entirely! Herman Cain also announced that instead of being president of the United States, he’s going to run A WEB SITE. Yeah, and as of this writing, that address redirects to a different site, where you get a blast of that 9-9-9 number-ology stuff.

Ten million dollars well spent.

As Herman Cain pointed out, he was *this close* to the presidency. A real quote: “We’re in the Final Four! This IS a great nation!”

For more on Cain and the other candidates for president, go to our feature Common Bonds: Presidential Candidates 2012.

(Photo from WENN. Doll from Herobuilders.)

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